A Guideline for Having "The Talk"

 

Hi Readers,

You’ve noticed some changes in your parent, sibling, spouse, friend, or neighbor. You do not know if you should speak up or assume the position that it is none of your business. You may even doubt yourself and wonder if you are meddling or being nosey. Or you may ask yourself, “Am I overthinking this?”

Listen to that voice in your head that tells you something is not right and act. But how? Gather accurate and relative details. Begin with keeping notes on observable changes. This means write down what you see but without judgment or diagnosis: Write down what you have observed.

Declining physical health is common among older people, but unexplained dramatic weight loss, frequently falling, taking medications inappropriately (polypharmacy), declining personal hygiene, and sudden-onset confusion or increasing confusion are all red flags.

Is the home interior neglected with piles of laundry, dirty dishes piling up, and trash cans overflowing? Are there signs of hoarding? Are there foul odors? Is the exterior littered with debris and dirt? Is the lawn overgrown or the in-ground backyard pool full of green algae and muck?

It is time for “the conversation.” You know the one. The one that everyone dreads. I recommend downloading and printing out the pamphlet from Right at Home, “A Guide to Having the Right Conversations.” The publication is a step-by-step practical guide for families and friends to communicate effectively about caregiving and remaining independent with outside help. I recommend thoroughly reviewing the guide and developing strategies for your talk. I also recommend rehearsing to ensure that your tone is welcoming and not threatening. After all, a lot is at stake, and you want to make sure your approach is welcoming and positive, not intimidating, or argumentative. Readers, I know how difficult this is, as I had “the talk” with my mother, my husband, and a best friend.

Please click on this link below and access the full guide. You have nothing to lose.

 

RightConversations Guide. Download here rightconversations-brochure.pdf

This link has the link for the RightConversation Guide and three different resources including the Conversation Planner, Family Action Planner, and the Information Journal. RightConversationsGuide | Right at Home | Resources for Seniors and Families